Friday, December 28, 2007

Juno: biggest "eh, I guess it was good" movie of the year


First for the part that everybody already knows. Juno is an independent film about a 16 year old girl, Juno (Ellen Page), who became pregnant with the child of one of the other students at her high school (Michael Cera). She decides to keep her baby and give it up for adoption to a seemingly nice suburban couple, Mark (Jason Bateman) and Vanessa (Jennifer Garner). She gains the support of her parents and everything goes swimmingly for the most part. It was directed by Jason Reitman (Thank You For Smoking) and written by Diablo Cody (real name: Brook Busey-Hunt).

Alright, now on to more interesting things. To summarize my opinion on Juno in comparison to those of others, in the words of Mugatu, "I feel like I'm taking crazy pills." I had been looking forward to this movie for a little while; not only was it getting rave reviews (94% on rotten tomatoes, damn!), but it also had both Michael Cera and Jason Bateman in it, two of my favorite people in the biz who haven't been reunited since their roles in Arrested Development. I was excited for a fresh plot, great characters, and funny/thought provoking dialogue and plot.

Well this is what I get for getting my hopes up. When I first walked out of the theater, I knew Juno had not quite lived up to my expectations, but I had somewhat enjoyed it, and it certainly had some amusing parts, so I was satisfied. However, upon further review of the movie, I quickly realized how it was no where near what I had hoped or what the reviews had told me to expect. My opinion grew worse and worse every time I thought about Juno; I can barely even remember substantial things I liked about it.

Let us start with the dialogue. Almost every review (including the one on the featured poster) claims that the dialogue in Juno is new, witty, and funny. I guess one out of three isn't bad because it sure is new, but it is most certainly not witty or funny for more than a couple of minutes. Never before have I encountered a character with dialogue so absurd as Juno. After the first scene in which she interacts with a convenience store cashier (Rainn Wilson), I already felt saturated with over the top shit dialogue that was making a desperate attempt at being hip. If only I had known that the entire movie was going to be the same type of dialoge, over and over again. I suppose Diablo Cody has never heard the saying "everything in moderation," because she wrote the script in a way that every god damn thing that comes out of Juno's mouth (and most of the other characters) had to be witty/sarcastic/funny. And no one can deny that some of the things she says do, indeed, posses such qualities. But these moments are so few and far between that the rest of it brings the movie way down. As the reviewer Bill Clark put it, "Diablo Cody has absolutely raided the Urban Dictionary in her effort to craft The Coolest Screenplay Ever," that last part being sarcasm. Basically, the dialogue tries way, way too hard to be funny/cool in order to give off the idea that it is fresh and witty, but it quickly becomes repetitive and extremely annoying. For example, the use of the terms "home-skillet" and "honest to blog" in Juno (or anything else) greatly anger me and are in no way amusing. This annoyingly stupid dialogue also brought down the character Juno, who became increasingly more unrealistic with almost everything she said. I can't even imagine a person in real life talking the same way that she does in Juno, and if I did know someone who constantly talked like that, I would most certainly not enjoy their company; she is almost impossible to relate to. How the majority of of the reviewers I have seen have not included this in their criticisms, I do not understand. For those who have seen it and know what I'm talking about, I guarantee that if the comic relief character in the movie National Treasure (we all know who I'm talking about) talked the way Juno (and other characters) does, people would hate it.

As for the plot, it was interesting enough, it kept me in the theater, but it was fundamentally flawed. Thematically, Juno was very confused, and it lacked the great punch that good dramedy indies such as Little Miss Sunshine possessed. Throughout the movie I kept waiting for a fantastic conclusion that was heart-felt and powerful, but that moment never arrived. Simply put, Juno spreads itself way too thin; it tries to cover so many large issues at once that an overall message is completely lost by the end (and the dialogue does not help). Once things start getting more serious in the third act, the story become more interesting (possibly because of the decreased amount of distractingly bad dialogue), but it ends up falling apart, failing to bring it all together.

I left Juno with absolutely no desire to see it again, and probably wouldn't if I were given the chance. It was not very funny, although it had some moments, the dialogue was unbelievably "look at how cool this is" and the plot was barely good enough to keep me interested to the end. Despite all this, it was alright, I don't hate it and I've definitely seen worse movies. So see it if you really think you want to, but don't feel like you should because of its amazing reviews. If you're on the fence about it, don't bother.

And how could I leave my readers without a quote from Pete Hammond, who is seemingly the only reviewer for Maxim magazine. Amazingly, this is the first time I've seen Pete Hammond write anything negative about a film, even though it was just a sentence, and he even balances it out with a compliment at the end (nice save there, Pete!). So, soak it up, I have a feeling we will not see one of these again for a while.

"[Juno] is a terrific and richly original comedy, like no other this year. First-time screenwriter Diablo Cody has a great ear for quirky dialogue and creating misfit teen characters many in the audience will relate to. Some of it is a little too contrived, particularly an abrupt shift in tone in scenes between Bateman and Page, but most of it works surprisingly well."

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Beowulf: in IMAX 3D!


Looking at this poster for Beowulf (or other ads for it) might make you think that it's a shitty movie which is pointlessly computer generated, which is understandable; the CGI characters look exactly like their actor/actress counterparts and the rest of the movie is made to look like real life, why not just make it a live action film? Well, I'll tell you why. Because then Beowulf would not have been filmed in IMAX 3D. For those of you who have never experienced the future of animated cinema that is IMAX 3D, you need to see this movie in it. Even the largest skeptics of Beowulf will have to admit how absolutely amazing it looks in IMAX 3D. Just try to imagine looking at that poster, but with the sword coming out of the picture and seemingly sticking right in front of your face. Incredible! And the entire movie is like that! It was a completely unparalleled experience for me, I have never found myself so involved in a movie. I already can't wait for the next IMAX 3D movie to come out, no matter what it is. I guess I will have to go see Beowulf again in the meantime to get my fix. So basically, I probably can no longer see this movie on dvd or any other non-3D format without being disappointed by its non three-dimensional-ness.

Anyways, on to the movie itself. Of course the animation looked amazing, there is nothing I can complain about there. The plot is based on an Old English epic poem which I have never read nor do I plan to read. I don't know how closely the plot of the movie follows the story of the poem, but damn there is definitely some epic stuff in the movie. For example, there is a story/flashback in the movie in which Beowulf (the main hero, voiced/played by Ray Winstone) has an "open sea race." And as if a swimming race across an entire ocean isn't epic enough, Beowolf encounters an entire horde of gigantic sea monsters during said race. Then he kills every single one of them (using only a dagger), while continuing to race. The only reason why he ended up losing the race was because he was tempted by a mermaid after he had slain all of the sea monsters. Add the fact that this was all in IMAX 3D and you got one damn epic scene. And that's just one of them. There are plenty of other monster and dragon fights to keep you in a thorough and constant awe of this movie.

Unfortunately though, after all this epic-ness and jaw-dropping 3D animation, the end falls somewhat short. It wasn't much of a conclusion, it was actually somewhat open ended (but the possibility of a sequel is pretty much zero I would think... I can't say why though). I was hoping/expecting that the movie would go on longer, but it didn't, making the ending kind of awkward as well as disappointing.

That's my only solid complaint about Beowulf. Obviously it is not any sort of Oscar contender and was made for entertainment, not thought provocation. So don't go in expecting any of those things, but do expect to get your pants wow'ed off.

Monday, November 5, 2007

American Gangster


Damn, that is a badass poster. Wait, it looks kind of familiar... I think Scarface did it already. Or was it The Godfather (sorry so small)? Either way, I think I'm starting to see a pattern. If you're going to make a movie about gangsters and drugs, then you must, must have a poster with a black/white background contrasted by a solid black/white badass character from your movie. Add some cool graphics to the background (such as a skyline) to make it a little more original, and voila, you have a badass poster on your hands.

So I'm reviewing the new movie American Gangster in today's installment. It's about a gangster, Frank (Denzel Washington), in New York who figures out a way to get his "product" directly from a cheap source in Vietnam, driving out all of his competition. And while this is going on, a police detective, Richie (Russel Crowe, see the poster), is on the hunt for the top drug dealer in New York, who happens to be Frank.

American Gangster starts off extremely strong (you will see in the video below), opening with an extremely violent scene that is not very necessary or relevant to the story, but a great scene nonetheless. However, it gave me the impression that American Gangster was going to be the next Scarface/Godfather, which (unfortunately) just isn't true, as one discovers by the end of the movie (this will be discussed later).

The majority of the movie is spent establishing Frank as the dominant gangster in New York, and Richie's chase after him. While there is no problem with this, it's really unfortunate that the two main characters never actually meet until the very end of the movie; Frank doesn't even know of his counterpart's existence until then. It could've used a scene similar to Heat, in which they meet together in a cafe sometime in the middle of the movie and discuss how one or the other is going to "go down." It would've added a lot more conflict and made the story even more engaging.

Throughout the movie it is made extremely clear that Frank and Richie are polar opposites. Frank is a gangster who runs thousands of kilos of cocaine into the country using the military and will kill anyone if necessary. Richie, on the other hand, is what looks to be like the only straight cop in all of the New York police force, every other cop takes bribes from gangsters to look the other way. I don't really have a problem with this, it's necessary for the movie, but it just seems somewhat exaggerated. It's also kind of annoying to have the idea that Richie is an unusually good cop constantly rammed into my head. I mean, I get it, stop fucking telling me.

[WARNING - THE FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH/VIDEO CONTAINS A MINOR SPOILER FOR THE END OF THE MOVIE, DON'T READ/WATCH IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE EXPOSED TO SUCH THINGS, BUT YOU'RE MISSING OUT]
While these issues are somewhat bothersome, they don't really bring down the movie that much, it's still quite engrossing. My main problem with the movie that makes me think less of it is the complete 180 it that it pulls of at the end. As I said earlier, the entire movie is spent establishing Frank as this ruthless, badass gangster who won't give up. Despite all this, once Frank is caught by Richie, he decides to join sides with Richie in order to bring down all of his family members as well as police who worked with him or took money from him. I know this is a true story, but the way it is portrayed completely changes Frank's character in an unreasonable fashion. All of a sudden Frank becomes all "buddy-buddy" with Richie; the two seem like best friends by one of the last scenes. Contrary to the almost all of the movie, Frank is portrayed as a fucking good person in the last scenes. That's right, that guy who shot and killed a guy only after setting him on fire in the first scene, is now a good person. In order to fully demonstrate my point I have found a video which shows both the very first and one of the last scenes from American Gangster. Watch and judge for yourself (keep in mind that Russel Crowe is the guy who has been trying to find and arrest this ruthless gangster throughout the ENTIRE movie):



[OK YOU CAN START READING NOW IF YOU SKIPPED THE EARLIER PART]
Despite these shortcomings (not to mention the length, they could have easily shortened it to a more reasonable length) American Gangster is thoroughly involving and presents a great story (which is based on true events, by the way). And although it never reaches the level of hardcore-ness that is achieved in the very first scene, it definitely held my interest throughout the rest of the movie. For a crime/gangster drama, it is excellently presented and definitely worth seeing.

American Gangster starts fast, maintains a good pace through most of the movie, but it does fall flat towards the end. The only thing that really bothered me about it was Frank's unreasonable character change at the end of the movie. Other than that, it's a well done film and, although it probably will not achieve the status that Ridley Scott looked like he was going for (as an epic gangster movie, such as Scarface), it is still a great watch and I recommend it to anyone who enjoys a good crime drama.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

The Darjeeling Limited


So it's finally time for my first movie review, and it's about The Darjeeling Limited. I'm not sure if I need to watch this movie a second time through to fully appreciate it, but I was somewhat disappointed by it after watching it once. It certainly had all the usual Wes Anderson stylings common to his movies, such as quirky off-beat dialogue, but it felt like something was missing by the time the credits started to roll. The story line was great and original, and the characters played off each other quite well, but it didn't provide the full sense of accomplishment by the end that I got from his other films. Sure, the brothers ended up accomplishing their intended task while hitting both amusing and serious patches along the way, but it seemed rather insignificant when it was all over.

It's entirely possible, however, that I just need to see this movie again to catch things that got by me the first time. It's also possible that my expectations for Wes Anderson movies have just become too high, since I loved his last film (The Life Aquatic) so much. Either way, I am not trying to say I disliked this movie, it was good, but I was hoping to get more out of it.

So if you're a Wes Anderson fan, this movie is worth seeing, it's not his best (despite what Pete Hammond has to say, see below) so don't expect wonders, but it's definitely enjoyable. And even if you have no idea who Wes Anderson is, I'd still suggest seeing it, but I'd also recommend seeing his other movies as well so you can have something to compare it to.

And, on a completely different note, as discussed in my first post, here is an absolutely wonderful quote from my favorite movie reviewer, Pete Hammond of Maxim:

"The Darjeeling Limited is a wonderful mix of humor and humanity with vintage Wes Anderson at his finest and funniest, as he takes us on a soul-searching magical mystery tour."

For those of you who are unaware, Pete seems to only write things in his reviews with the intention of getting his name into movie commercials, and this is a fine example. So next time you see a movie preview on television, pay attention to the writer of the quote, chances are its Pete Hammond.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Constable's first blog post

Hello everyone. This is my first blog post ever, so try to bear with me. If you haven't guessed already, I created this blog in order to share my opinions on certain films. I'll write about movies that I have either just seen (in theaters or at home), or movies that I have seen before but feel so passionate about that they deserve a post without me watching them again. I decided to make this first post just an intro because I just spent a decent amount of time making and fixing up the banner that you see at the top of the page, so let me know just how much you love it, but now I am too tired to exert myself with my first review.

Anyways, sometimes I will try to include little extras with my reviews. For example, quotable quotes from the movie, amazing movie taglines, and, the one I'm most looking forward to, Pete Hammond's (movie reviewer from Maxim) I'm-just-writing-this-to-get-my-name-into-movie-commercials quotes. If you have any other ideas, just let me know and I'll see what I can do.

That's about it for my first post. So leave comments if you'd like, let me know what you think. I look forward to writing my first actual review soon, so check back.